The 2016 Election Follies

Guess Who isn't interested in being treated like your puppet?

I’ve kept silent long enough!  This election is a blast.

I was raised in a family of Independents.  I wasn’t raised to believe one party was “perfect” and the other one consisted of “scum.”  I didn’t grow up with nightly dinner conversations that relentlessly praised the family’s designated party because we weren’t members of either one, and so what and who cares?   Ballots, I was told, are secret for a reason.  The reason is that it’s nobody’s business who someone else votes for.  Period.

If one of the parties came up at my house at all, it was usually after some friend of my parents would get hysterical about an issue, prompting my father to do an imitation of them later.  My father should have done voice-overs.  He can imitate anybody, and to perfection.  He can still do a hilarious routine of the family friend who would go hog-wild over this or that political news item, arms waving, screeching, usually in an embarrassingly public place like a café, at the top of his lungs.  He does another one of a different friend who’s in the other party and gets just as manic.   I’d do a few political rant imitations myself, of teachers who kept trying to politically brainwash the kids, and had some real doozies whose attempts to become my “political puppeteer” just didn’t work, except to give me a wealth of “material.”

I’ve heard there’s a regional element to a lot of this.  In some places, the Republicans are the conniption-fit throwers.  Where I grew up, though, it was the Democrats who tended to get a hundred times more hysterical, flew off the handle more often, spent more time attempting to control who their friends voted for than they did cultivating their friendships, and went far more berserk.  Thus they gave the Quinn family more comic inspiration.

Did they ever!  We’d roar.  We’d split our sides.  We’d consider it all quite a sideshow – right after getting past the fact that these displays were, of course, ones we had never signed up to hear in the first place and could have easily lived without.

These days, with Election 2016, the unsolicited party sales pitches, the name-calling and insanity has reached the best fever pitch I’ve ever seen.  I feel like the country has become like an episode of one of my favorites show of the 19770s, namely, the uproarious spoof that was SOAP.  “These are the Tates.  And these are the Campbells.  And this is….Soap!”

That said, as much as I usually try to stay out of these kinds of discussions, I cannot resist adding this.  I find the “basket of deplorables” comment made by the unlikable Hillary Clinton regarding Donald Trump’s supporters to be the worst one I’ve ever heard from any Presidential candidate, ever, at any time, any place, anywhere, any how, and bar none.  She wants to represent everybody, but then she puts her opponent’s supporters in such a sub-category?  It’s the sort of thing I’ve heard from  her party’s most fanatical, lunatic-fringe types my whole life, though.  It’s why I grew up so utterly unimpressed by them, no matter how many tried to get in my face and “convert” me.  I’m not really surprised their top designee of the moment said that.   After all, my immediate reaction, whenever someone starts bellowing propaganda, has always been to joke, “Uh-oh!  Here it comes!  Quick, where’s my headphones?”  I’m used to their craziness, though it doesn’t persuade.  Well, never look for logic in politics.

Strange, though.  You would think they’d want the Independents and swing voters, the ones they most need to reach, to hear them, not push them so far they would rush to tune them out.

But though life may be a tragedy to those who feel, it’s a comedy to those who laugh.  To that end, if Candidate Clinton has insulted you, let’s have some fun with this!  I’ve created T-shirts, available at my little LogoSportswear online store, that declare, “Kiss Me, I’m Deplorable!”  I think if they’re going to call ya names, folks, the best thing to do in creative retaliation is to turn the insult on its head, be proud of it – and flaunt it.  Tee hee hee!

Oh, one more thing.  Did my life ever change based on who was the President of the moment?  Yes, actually, it did, but once and only once.  One little time, when I got a bigger tax rebate during the regime of one particular President, life improved by a few hundred bucks.  That’s it.  The rest of the time, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, what will be will be, and life goes on.

Here’s the T-shirt link.  Enjoy!  Coconuts Unanimous T-Shirts

America has become a soap opera spoof! Here's the good old cast of SOAP.

America has become a soap opera spoof! Here’s the good old cast of SOAP.  They should’ve run for office.





7 thoughts on “The 2016 Election Follies

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